Upon meeting people- Law of Attraction

We choose not randomly each other. We meet only those who already exist in our subconscious. -Sigmund Freud.

Another perspective that I know and believe in is this. ‘Before being born into this world, all the souls reside in the realm of souls. It is there, they take the Covenant. Thereafter, they freely meet other souls. They get along with some and not get along with others.’

It is said that the souls that get along in the realm of souls, if they happen to meet in this world, get on with each other.

When I read the above mentioned quote by Freud, this perspective came to my mind. I have no idea if this can be linked in any way to the subconscious. Some things do not necessarily need rationale.

However, I also think that Freud most likely was thinking through the psychological perspective. 88% of our mind being subconscious, we attract those people towards us, that our subconscious dictates in silence. When I look back and the many faces that I have personally come across, some good, others not so good. I can definitely see a correlation of some sort as to why I came across those people.

It is difficult to change our nature and beliefs that are embedded from a young age. However, we can nurture our subconscious. We can consciously create and replace old neural pathways. Well, if you don’t believe me, there is scientific evidence. The Power of Habit, Atomic Habits, The Chimp Paradox are excellent books that deal and explain it with scientific evidence.

So, why am I writing this? Subconscious mind! The unconscious mind! The conscious mind!

Thinking in relation to what Frued has said, we attract people that exist in our subconscious. Alter your subconscious, and you attract people accordingly. I can say that there is a lot of truth in this. If you believe everyone around you is acting in your favour, it will be so, because you will attract more people that do act in your favour. If you think the world is your enemy, you will come across more ill-intent people.

Why do we learn these lessons the hard way? That’s human nature perhaps 😅

I am grateful to the many people that I have come across. I am also grateful to the ones who were not so good, they taught me to alter my subconscious, to attract more kind and compassionate people towards myself.

Tongue and Speech

Words are powerful. What we say, how we say it often has consequences attached to it. Words have the power to uplift someone or break them depending how you say them. I express some thoughts around it in the linked article.

There’s a reason why the tongue, just a small muscle but one, that has the capacity to bring out so much good or cause much damage, is caged behind the teeth. If the lips were an entrance to the prison, the teeth and jaw comprise that prison. Tongue is the prisoner. Why? Because we should only speak when necessary.

Rumi said,”before you speak let your words pass three gates. Is it true? Is it necessary? Is it kind?”

In today’s world, this has somewhat changed. We can speak online via blogs, articles, comments, opinions that can be shared with the whole world. Or as many people that read those thoughts/online speech. There is a blur between speech and thought.

Like how I am currently writing out my thoughts and turning it into an article without saying a word. My tongue is still in its cage, yet it speaks. It speaks through words that have been typed.

This is why in today’s world, this golden narration that mentions, “the best of you are those from whose tongue and hands others are safe.” This turns ever more relevant.

Hands are not just used to cause physical harm to others in today’s world. Hands can partake in emotional harm that we can cause to others by typing out thoughtlessly, by uttering hate speech, online arguments, trivial talk, online gossips, backbiting through private messaging, spreading rumors. The more I think, all vices that were committed by the tongue prior to Internet connectivity, can be now committed remaining silent. I am silent in my speech yet my mind thinks, the hands and fingers type.

Now it is up to each of us individually how we make use of this thinking and typing. Do we use it to spread love, peace, goodness, call to peace or whatever other good there is? Or do we use it for malignant purposes?

Unlike being able to sense other person’s energy in real life, you can’t sense the electrical signals that type out those words.

It is still possible to grasp some of it through well articulated thoughts, articles, opinions etc.

Trying to follow down the spiritual path, I try to restrain my tongue and increasingly my thoughts. I smile as I write this thought because I do think since starting blogging regularly and with more consistency, I have allowed myself to become more quiet. I talk less, reflect more, prefer solitude, even though I score quite high on extraversion on the personality tests. Regardless of how extraverted I may be I think that I am well balanced with introversion and extraversion. Simply put, I am an ambivert.

This said though, I do see this online crises of trivial talk, disputes and arguments, hate speech worsening. Why? Because of rising inequality, a continuing widening of gaps; political, social and wealth.

Ever since I learnt martial arts and became confident in my ability to fight, I saw fighting as useless, something that will not bring me any good. I stopped being the aggressor. I stopped being the provocative type, I stopped being the mocking type who would push others in an argument to get physical.

Similarly learning and spirituality has helped me overcome some of my other faults. I am not implying that I have reached some sort of enlightenment, I can only hope to get there, some day perhaps? I don’t think I am at a level that can come close to the great spiritual leaders.

Because I am thinking out loud and not muttering the words writing this article, I am shifting from thought to thought. The direction I was trying to steer my thoughts after mentioning the rising values, social, political and wealth gap is how the Internet helps fuel all this. The media and news puts more light on fear and despair. The media and news does more to divide than unite. In addition, the rising populism of the extreme right and extreme left is very quickly reshaping many narratives. Combine this with the Great Reset and trying to shift the paradigm towards environmentally friendly world. What we see so far is like Dr. Anas has mentioned in this thread The mother of all Enrons. Carbon neutrality is just another window dressing and accounting fraud. In reality, current policies are exacerbating a brewing crisis.

I can’t help but think that what is actually happening is that the widening values and social gap is being taken advantage of. Totalitarianism is swiftly taking over under the guise of Liberal democracy. While some groups are being empowered currently, it is being done so without them realising that in actual fact, their freedom and rights too are being jeopardised. Haven’t the masses learnt the oldest trick in the books yet? We keep repeating this over and over again throughout history. Divide and rule! Take a moment to think about this, you are empowered to speak up but the speech creates a shift in the other end of the spectrum leading to an increasing divide. The two sides then, are pitted against one another.

This is a world wide phenomenon being actualized in different ways in different countries, hence why I am speaking or rather thinking about it in general terms. The biggest driver behind it was covid. It’s like, a mass experiment is being conducted in various ways. It’s most vivid in the so called Western democracies.

I stand for peace, I neither see myself on the right nor the left. We don’t know whether in the coming years this will resolve without a conflict or there will be a lot of internal and external strife before a resolution. Rather a revolution!

Lol I am neither a conspiracy theorists, nor a revolutionary. I much consider myself a wanderer that likes to observe and think. I would like to think that my views are formed after a lot of research and learning about different social, values, political and economic issues. But I leave it here for you to decide. Think things through…are you a pawn on the bigger board? Is the force behind you leading you to the other side? Will that happen through strife and unrest or through sensible agreements and disagreements? Is the force pulling your strings allied to you, or is it associating itself to you for their purpose, gain and glory?

You don’t have to think of the whole world. Because I am thinking in general terms. A good place to start is by asking which group do I belong to? What is happening around us? What forces are empowering us? What forces are engaged in the disenfranchisement? Are your rights and freedom in jeopardy? What can you do to engage your community to raise this awareness?

Damn! When I started writing this article, I had no idea my thoughts were going to go down this path. I guess I have been thinking a lot. Or perhaps I have been reading a lot and reflecting on the many different things I have been reading. But reading books only empowers me to think things through different perspectives. It spurs different thoughts about current affairs, both political and economic. At the same time, these are loosely held opinions as I am not trying to speculate on the future, I am not trying to delve into the unknown.

I am content and living in the present because I know ultimately what my beliefs are. All that is happening, has happened or will happen is through the divine will. Our choices are merely manifestations. I just have to work and make efforts to choose wisely and ask for wisdom to be patient with things that are not in my control. I’d like to urge you to do the same whatever your beliefs. Focus on making the best choices in the present moment.

To get a further idea on what has shaped some of my thinking before, take a look at this post. I wrote this at the end of 2019 reading some history books, and all of Ray Dalio’s then published work. However, I found that my thinking was too idealistic and looked at things from an unrealistic perspective. International relations, geopolitics and politics itself has a big influence on how things unfold/transpire.

Writing this once more, my thoughts turn their attention at the power dynamics that is in play between nations/countries, between different ideologies, different groups and the individuals themselves that are power hungry. So far as the human nature goes, power corrupts humans. Yet without their being an authority, civil strife and chances of anarchy increase. Ok… I think if I keep carrying on I will not stop writing this post. The original purpose of my writing this post was to remind myself, how blur is the line between keeping others safe from my hands and tongue. It is essentially the same in this day and age. Another important reminder that I have mentioned in prior posts comes to mind here paraphrasing, kind words are better than charity followed by injury and insult.

Finally, a new lunar year starts tonight or tomorrow depending on the new crescent. I don’t usually make new year’s resolution. However, this being a special day today, I want to commit to introducing some new changes. Developing a winning mindset. Here’s the linked 2 videos I watched in the morning to feel inspired. Muhammad Ali and Kobe Bryant, two top athletes talking about how to be the winner. While I practise writing without muttering and just paying attention to my thoughts and being cognizant of my thoughts. I wonder whether any of you feel an electric pulse run down the centre left and bottom part of the brain, when you feel inspired or when you feel focused. Often when I feel inspired and create a connection for that inspiration with some of my already set goals, I feel this electric pulse in the centre left side of the brain that runs down towards the bottom left side of the neck. Like something getting rewired in me, it is motivating, the sensation and the feeling itself. Would love to hear your thoughts on this.

So recently, I have been listening to exegesis of some chapters for the purposes of spirituality, reading some philosophical books. Eric Fromm, currently reading Fydor Dostoevsky, and will probably revisit some Theology and Nietzsche after going through Dostoevsky’s work. This extra reading is to satiate the curiosity and thirst for learning more and looking at the world through different perspectives.

What I wish for is the ability to be able to read a book from a writers perspective, that would be a powerful thing. Imagine reading it from writer’s perspective and then reading it once more shedding that perspective and bringing in your own insights. It can be done I think, because some of the fictional works I have read e.g., Dan Brown, Robert Ludlum, J.K Rowling and Haruki Murakami, some of my favourite authors whose works completely captivate me and I can just immerse myself into a different world and at times feel so in tune with writer’s thoughts that I can see how the story is growing but at the same time, the curiosity and escapism keeps me latched on to read more and more.

Haha, this is what happens when I write spontaneously and just listen to my thoughts and type them out. I guess last year and when I first started writing on here, this was very much my style. Now, I sort of try to stick to the topic but that makes it sort of tedious.

Here once more, I have to remind myself the importance of humility and knowing the Creator of the thoughts. Recognising the apparent and real ability and be grateful for the many opportunities and vigour that keeps me at learning more stuff. Imagine the amount of knowledge there is in this world. Of the past generations and the present, if that knowledge is equivalent to the oceans. Then my knowledge is probably equivalent to a single molecule of water. It won’t even equal a drop.

While it is great to acquire more knowledge and learn more, it’s even better to specialise in a niche field. That’s where my current focus is. A winning mindset is essential to successfully specialise.

I have learnt a lot from these books

So as promised, I have been wanting to share my booklist. In this booklist, I will share the books that have helped me with psychology and self-development. I don’t read 52 books a year like an average CEO, but I do think I read quite a lot for my lifestyle. I listen more than I read. By the way, if you are a blog reader, I talk about a lot of different books in my blogs too…you just have to be willing to read and find the diamonds among the pile of treasure 😉 haha… am not for self-praise but you see what I done there 😀

Anyhow, if you want to grow, develop your character, learn more about yourself, your business, or even just reflect on life and understand the world through different perspectives. I would recommend checking out these books. These are my top favourites in psychology/ self-development genre not in any particular order though.

  1. The Examined Life ( How we lose and find ourselves) by Stephen Grosz
  2. The Chimp Paradox by Prof Steve Peters
  3. Option B By Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant (I am a big fan of Adam Grant’s work)
  4. Give and Take by Adam Grant (You see what I mean lol)
  5. Originals by Adam Grant ( on my wish list is his latest book Think Again)
  6. Can’t Hurt Me by David Goggins
  7. Principles by Ray Dalio
  8. Atomic Habits by James Clear
  9. Deep Work by Cal Newport
  10. Focus by Daniel Goleman ( I am a big fan of Daniel Goleman’s work on EQ)
  11. Primal Leadership by Daniel Goleman
  12. Maximum Willpower by Kelly McGonigal
  13. The Crowd Study of the Popular mind By Gustave Le Bon
  14. How to win friends and influence people by Dale Carnegie
  15. A Hero with a Thousand Faces (Joseph Campbell) I know this is philosophy genre, but there is lots to learn from this book.
  16. Thus Spoke Zarathustra by Friedrich Nietzsche
  17. Beyond Good and Evil by Friedrich Nietzsche
  18. Cognitive Behavioural Therapy by Jason M. Satterfield
  19. Thinking Fast and Slow by Daniel Kahneman ( This is a classic)
  20. Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself by Joe Dispenza
  21. 12 Rules for Life by Jordan B Peterson
  22. Maps of Meaning by Jordan B Peterson

Instead of including any external links, I will let you search for these books. Most are available on Amazon, Audible, Waterstones or any other book store. I have some of the above books in hard copy and some in audible version. Basically the easiest way to get them in possession ahaha. Nietzsche is quite difficult to comprehend but there is value there to be found if you keep an open mind. They say there is a thin line between insanity and a genius mind. Wow… these are just some of the books I have read since 2018. Before that I used to read fiction only.

I stopped reading fiction for a while, but I still do from time to time. Maybe next time I will share some of my favourite fictional novels.

While you are here, check out my previous post on How to read a book! 📖